It’s complicated by @dinewhitme

I think modern day relationships have 3 crucial “make or break” moments. At 3 months, the rose tinted glasses come off and you have to decide whether or not the person you’ve been all sweaty palms and you can have whatever you like over is really worth hanging your heart on. At 6 months, your respective insecurities start to crumble away and you ultimately have to decide if your lover’s baggage is right for you. Then the decider – between 1 year to 18 months is where you’ve relished in the happiest and saddest days of your life and more than once, you’ll find yourself wondering if this is really worth it. I say, if you make it through that, chances are, you’ll be set for life.

If we’re being official, I would say that it’s really only been 26 days. Unofficially speaking, our time together could easily add up to 5 or 6 months – it’s complicated.

Freedom was my vixen in the night; she took me by the throat and we feverishly fell into a prolonged summer of fine wine, travel and sleeping in. In the beginning, it was very “in that moment, I swear we were infinite” – after shaking off 5 years’ worth of long nights and rigorous commitments, I was ready to be wayward. Three months later, I crashed – it was too much of a good thing and I wanted something more constant.

I watched as my friends started marrying into $50,000 jobs and going steady from Monday to Friday. I on the other hand, spent the equivalent of three days a week working in photography and writing my heart out at night after Freedom fell asleep. Every time my bank account began to dip dangerously low, a job would come in at just the right time, with enough to tide me over for the next 2 weeks; 3, if I spent wisely. I was sad and Freedom did not understand – this was what I wanted, wasn’t it?

Yes, I’m the one in many that didn’t travel through the conventional Route 9-to-5 after graduation. There were many times over the last 5 or 6 months where things felt like they were falling into place or falling apart. On the nights when you’re stinking poor and your friends are sipping $22 cocktails with ease or orchestrating how to get the most out of their annual leave in Europe – it stings. You feel like giving up on what you’re passionate about and selling yourself to the lowest bidder, if that means some consistency and knowing what will come next. But, on the days when I’m speaking to new clients with vigour or bouncing off fellow creatives over a good cup of coffee, I remember why I chose this path.

I decided that I wanted Freedom, uncertainty and all. Freedom always found time to encourage me at 4 in the morning, whether I was editing articles or feeling heavy in Lightroom. Freedom selflessly gave me time to be curious; to read books, learn a new language and better myself. Freedom never held me too tightly, “one day,” she said, “you’ll happily give me up, you won’t even notice when I’m gone.” We’re starting to understand each other, Freedom and me; 1 year to 18 months later – it’ll still be worth it.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Whitney Ng, is a recent graduate of UWA in Perth. She is the writer of dinewhitme.com. Director of Au de Shiok a consultancy helping the food industry better communicate their story in a digital world and recently fronted a short video for Tourism WA… she’s a busy lady.

She Tweets from @dinewhitme

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